The Man from U.N.C.L.E.

So.

I want to kick my uncle's ass. Or maybe hit him with my car.

My uncle has been through some hard times. He's a recovering alcoholic, has two divorces under his belt, and he's separated with his third wife. He lost one job, but was able to find another.

Well, he's down in Louisiana on a construction job. He'd been going to AA meetings, but he relapsed last week. He hasn't left his trailer in about four days, he's been calling my grandma every five minutes. He says that he's sick, but he sounds like he's drunk, and he's being irrational and belligerent. I tried talking to him last night, but he just told me I was boring, and said he was going to kick my ass. Then he told me he was just joking. And then he tried to pick another fight.

And now my grandma is making a twelve hour round trip to bring him back, when he probably STILL won't leave his trailer. She wanted my cousin to drive with her, then she wanted my brother to, and then she wanted me to drive with her. She was able to get someone from the church, a lady who is accustomed to long-distance drives. As far as I'm concerned, my uncle can stay down there.

He's 50, and acting like he's 5.